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Messages - Caribou

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Parties / Welcome to a world of wonder!
« on: November 21, 2021, 09:24:22 am »
Nation in the Union: Greater Teronnia
Region: Citizens Alliance of Democracy
Discord Name (inc. #_ _ _ _):  Waluigi#3760

Mamma mia!  It's-a you!  Welcome to-a the UPP-a!  Holy canoli!

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Required: Questions for all Prime Minister Candidates

1. What makes you the best candidate for Prime Minister? What do you bring to the office which your opponent does not and why do you think you are better positioned to succeed in whatever you undertake?
I am the best candidate for Prime Minister because I am the best candidate for Prime Minister.  I will bring many things my opponents would never think to bring to the audience, like brownies or a humidifier.  It's a shame how people ignore the scourge that is dry skin.  I am better positioned to succeed because I am successful and well position to succeed, clearly.

2. How do you plan to address the current recruitment issues facing not just the capital but the Union as a whole, what steps will you take and how will this be brought about?
Lies.  Lies and deception.  We lure in young new nations with their dreams and aspirations by presenting ourselves as much better than we really are and by the time they know the truth - too late!  The sunk cost fallacy is in effect and they figure they've invested so much time here that they might as well stay.  Why do you think I'm still here?

3. Who would you appoint to your ideal Cabinet (ex-members, people who would be ineligible, and people not necessarily willing to serve can be included)? Why would you choose these people and what specific things would they bring to each office that you consider being most important?
I would appoint my personal friends and cronies while banning everyone I don't like from the region.  Bureaucracy is inefficient and Jacksonian theories of bureacratic management make the most sense.

4. If elected, how do you plan (if at all) to change the structure of the existing Ministries? Would you consider abolishing, creating, or merging any of them? Why?
I would merge them all into either the Ministry of Truth and the Ministry of Lies - but no one will know which is which.  Then we can all take turns guessing!  It will be a ton of fun and really increase activity in the region.

5. What will be on your legislative agenda? What reforms would you like to make to existing laws and how will you lobby the House to pass these reforms?
I will ban all laws and make every day the Purge.  I will lobby the House to stop being a bunch of babies and have long, drawn out public brawls to decide whose ideas are best.  The messier and bloodier the better, that's what I always say.

6. What plans do you have to tackle inactivity in the world assembly, what will you do to address this issue? Please provide a detailed plan.
Meh.  It's the World Assembly.  They do nothing of consequence and say a whole lot that still isn't all that important.  Sort of like the United Nations who they were originally named after.  Endorsements are nice and all, but we have our founder still active and the Feeder/Sinker regions basically control the WA anyway, so ... meh.

7. The Union in recent history has had an image problem when it comes to foreign affairs, how do you plan to address this?
A massive propaganda campaign.  We will paper over the cracks in our public image with catboys in cute maid outfits.  No one has to know how toxic and terrible this community is!

8. Do you plan on restoring the Union Armed Forces? If so, what do you plan for it?
Yes.  They will swear an eternal blood oath and enforce my will for all time.  I will be Prime Minister for life, eclipsing the sun and consuming it as one into my essence, becoming God herself!

9. As Prime Minister of the Union, it is your job to ensure the voices of every state and territory is heard and not just the capital. What plans do you have to address the lack of inter-union participation?
By forcing these uncivilized natives out of their uncultured cesspools and bringing them to the Capital where they can serve the rightful ruling class and learn how to be proper people.  We will then sell that useless extra land to build me a magnificent palace of gold.  Perhaps one day their descendents will be worthy of being the equals of a Capital citizen .... ha!  Sorry, that thought is just so ridiculous.  They are godless heathens, what use are they?  The Capital shall reign supreme regardless.  We are the light of the Union.

10. The Union Roleplay has suffered from serious inactivity issues. What are your plans to address this?
Roleplaying will be mandatory for all citizens.  This really sounds like a question for the Minister of Roleplay.  Here's a hot suggestion - make Minister positions elected and accountable to the people.

11. The Union has suffered from a lack of voter turnout in recent months. What are your plans to address this?
Ensuring 100% voter participation - by making it illegal for anyone but me to vote.

12. Any other comments you would like to add?
I have nothing more to say to the likes of you.

Required: Questions for all House Representative Candidates

1. Which House Bills do you plan to pass and/or repeal? Why?
The future is such a silly concept; live for the now!

2. In what ways should the Constitution be amended, if at all? Explain how the changes would improve the current system of governance.
The Constitution is perfect just the way she is, and the way you people keep body-shaming her and saying how she needs to change to look how you want her to is sickening.  You should be ashamed of yourselves.

3. What qualifies you to serve in the House? What makes this qualifying?
I mean, I'm here now and the region hasn't burned down (yet).  A few more months can't be that bad.

4. Do you think any changes should be made to existing House Procedures? If so, what changes should be made and why?
Yes.  It should be way less civilized.  Violence and gifs should be allowed, nay, encouraged!  It's so boring right now.  What's even the point of politics without the drama?  The scandal and intrigue?  Blech!

5. If elected, do you plan on running for Speaker? If so, what makes you a good candidate for this position and if not, who do you think would be a better candidate?
I do plan to run for Speaker.  I am a very loud and opinionated person, perfect to talk your ear off and keep going long after you and everyone else have lost interest, haranguing you into submission.  I don't know, I've only seen one Speaker in action, but I assume that's the job.

6. How do you plan to ensure the voices of your constituents are heard while in office?
A really, really big one of those megaphone things.  I don't know, they never really have anything worth saying.  Just a lot of angry shouting and pitchforks and torches and "down with the tyrant!" and dumb stuff like that.  This is the silliness that happens when we give people rights. 

7. How do you feel about the influence parties have on the House and electoral process, and should it be more or less? Explain your answer fully
I think parties divide us more and don't really serve much of a purpose, especially when we essentially have a one party state with the two parties basically believing in the same things.  There isn't enough diversity of thought in our regional political arena to make much use of parties, really.  The only reason the UPP even exists is because the Federalists didn't want to be the only party.  When you have to manufacture a second party just for diversity, maybe parties aren't the vital tools of democracy some seem to think they are.  Parties should definitely serve less of a role in our political process. 

8. The House of Representatives is the sole legal body with the ability to remove a Prime Minister from office with citizens vote after confirming it. Under what circumstances would you support the removal of one and what constitutes 'going too far'? Cite specific legal passages if necessary and ensure that your answer is sufficiently detailed.
In the words of a lot of people at this point, but originally in reference to pornography (the thinking man's politics): I'll know it when I see it.

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Nation: Caribou Island
Region: Force
Political Party: Union People's Party
Position Seeking: (Prime Minister / House Representative)

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Parties / Re: The Union People's Party
« on: October 27, 2021, 04:23:45 pm »
Nation in the Union: Acolhua
Region: Citizens' Alliance of Democracy
Discord Name: The Watcher#4260

Yo ho ho!  Welcome aboard, ye scurvy sea-dog!

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Parties / Re: The Union People's Party
« on: October 20, 2021, 11:03:01 am »
Nation in the Union: Aerien
Region: Force
Discord Name:Dark_HeartedWarrior#3499

Ahoy there, matey!  Welcome to the party!

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Past Elections / Re: Debate September 2021 Midterms
« on: September 06, 2021, 09:45:19 pm »
1. Which House Bills do you plan to create, pass or repeal? Why?
I see no pressing need for new laws.  Force is currently strong and needs stewards capable of maintaining its brilliance.

2. In what ways should the Constitution be amended, if at all? How would this improve the Constitution?
The Constitution needs no amending at the moment.  I may go over it with a fine-tooth comb later, but it seems functional.  She's cute.

3. What qualifies you to serve in the House? What makes this qualifying?
I have a pulse (sort of) and breath (definitely).  This is qualifying because the dead can't run for the House ... or can they?  I also have three years of experience with near-dictatorial power in a legislative body that administrated the RMB and regional affairs in a large, unnamed region where I exercised the legislative functions of my position to grow our region's gameside growth and activity to the point of making more than 3/4ths of our region's entire RMB activity have happened between 2017 and 2020 out of our existence since 2003.  I was the longest serving member of my position and served more terms than any other member in the body's history until my recent retirement, whereupon I created a new account and stumbled into Force and decided to jump right back into politics ... I just can't be still.  This is my fifth year on NS.  This is the first month I haven't been in government since 2018 and I'm already running for something.  This is a crisis.  This is a cry for help.  Maybe you shouldn't vote for me.  I clearly don't know when to stop myself and force my mind to take a rest. 

4. If elected, do you plan on running for Speaker? If so, what makes you a good candidate for this position and if not, who do you think would be a better candidate?
I do not plan on running for the Speaker, though I will support any Speaker who shows themself to be capable and confident in their abilities and has a vision to lead our fair Union into a new golden age.

5. How will you ensure that your constituents' voices are heard in the house?
I'll give everyone a really big megaphone so they can shout at us from outside.  I'll also keep my DMs and telegrams open so all the crazies can contact me 24/6, because even God rested for a day.  But no, 24/7, because I AM BETTER THAN GOD.  No further questions.

6. What reforms would you make to the house itself, if any? This can be in terms of structure, how the House conducts its work, or in any other manner.
Okay, there's one more question.  This would be my first term serving here, so I'm just going to sit and look pretty and learn.

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Parties / If you wanna be my member, you gotta get with my friends
« on: September 01, 2021, 03:28:55 pm »
Nation in the Union: Caribou Island
Region: Force
Discord Name (inc. #_ _ _ _): CELINE (and En)D(ym)ION#7712

gimme gimme gimme a membership after midnight
Won't somebody help me chase the federalists away

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